Falling down the slippery slope once again!

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I ran out of my anti depressants a few days ago and I haven’t took them for 3 days now and now I feel really down.

I feel really tired all the time, I’m physically struggling to gain enough energy to even take my dogs for a walk even tho I need the exercise and to loose weight, I’m not going to my groups as I don’t want to socialise with anyone and all I want to do is stay in the house and feel sorry for myself…but I don’t think this is all due to my tablets I think it is because of my parents too , everyday I am getting sick of living with my parents, I appreciate everything they have done for me but since going to Liverpool I feel like I have grown, I want a place on my own with my own rules, my stuff and without having to step of egg shells to please everyone all the time And do what they want me to do without getting any appreciation. I feel like my parents don’t care sometimes, they don’t take a second to ask me how I am feeling or coping its just Faye can u do this Faye can u do that! And don’t get me wrong I would do anything they ask me as it is their house and I want to pull my weight but I wish they would just take the time to talk to me once and a whole because as you know with depression sometimes u just want someone to talk to and cry to and get everything n out and I haven’t had that for the past few weeks not even from my partner so I’m lagging here I feel like I’m falling again!

I think I may have to sit them down and tell them, and discuss it with them.

Hopefully I get my tablets tomorrow and they will help me get back on my feet.

What I’m dreading the most tho is tomorrow…I have an interview for an insurance brokers!!!!

I’m majorly panicking here! What do I wear? What are they going to ask me? Will I make a good first impression? How do I possibly make myself look pretty and professional when I think every other woman is prettier than me and my self esteem is so low????

I will just have to chin up, put my mask on and get on with it! I really need a job to earn some more money so I’m not letting myself get in the way of getting this job I just hope it goes well!!!!:///

Wish me luck!!
Oh and I am really peeved off that my acne has been flaring up again lately has anyone got any suggestions as to how to clear it, I read that drinking more water cutting down sugar having loads of vitamin d and c is supposed to help but I just want to get rid of the redness for tomorrow without having to put loads of make up on??!!

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5 responses »

  1. GOOD LUCK! πŸ™‚

    so acne.. backwards to forwards, lol. yup cut back on sugar. Exercise helps loads too. Going on about that, the walk with the dogs… force yourself, Depression tells you not to do things and it becomes stronger. Getting out, even for a walk releases the same chemicals your antidepressants do, but with no side effects and very quickly. Remember depression lies.

    now about your parents, they are not going to understand depression likely. Not real depression. So take some time, maybe visit some websites that discuss it more together, so they understand. πŸ™‚ To many times they relate it to how they may feel if sad about something, but that is not truly depression is it?

    Pretend you have self confidence. It infects and soon you will πŸ™‚

    Amber.

  2. The first signs I’m getting ill again are finding it a real struggle to walk the dog and stopping cooking.

    I definitely feel you should talk to your housemates- they might surprise you and be really supportive. I kept to myself in my uni house and I wish I hadn’t now, because sometimes other people like to help and want to know what’s going on for you. Be brave!!

  3. Hi, I am sorry to read of your struggles here. It seems many things have accumulated to impact upon you at one; it is like dodging a ball, eventually you get hit. Seems unfair that everything works against us at once, can be quite perturbing. Yet, I hope you find the strength to keep positive and not be dragged to far down. Big hugs to you!
    Also, I wanted to forward this blogging prompt on to you – it is called ‘tagging’. It isn’t spam ,as I completed one from a good blogging friend. They are merely a bit of fun – I have set you some questions and hope you enjoy amswering to them?
    Its Your Turn Blogging Prompt
    Bex πŸ™‚

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