I’ve lost the sense of who I am :( HELP!

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Since my nervous breakdown and coming home from university everything has been set to reset, I have to work through the same anxieties, worrying and bad habits I had before (that took me all of high school and college-5+3 years) to work on and improve.

It is so frustrating having to work on these all over again but what I am finding worse is that since I had a nervous breakdown I have lost the sense of who I am, It had took me so long to build up the confidence in myself even if it was a tiny bit before I went to university and understand a little bit about who I am but now I feel as if my slate has been wiped clean. 

 

WHO AM I? WHAT ARE MY STRENGTHS? FLAWS=TO MANY TO COUNT(ONLY THING I KNOW), WHAT IS ATTRACTIVE ABOUT ME? AM I PRETTY? WHAT CLOTHES SUIT ME? AM I FAT? AM I CLEVER? WHATS MY PERSONALITY? 

 

I feel really lost in feeling this and lost as  person, I am going to all my support groups and etc, and I do have a little hope that I am going to get better but I haven’t a clue about how I am going to find out about myself again and this issue I feel so alone in, my partner doesn’t understand, but I don’t feel confident about who I am, I feel ugly to him and I don’t understand why he is with me, what he likes about me and I don’t want it to affect our relationship but I think it will. 

How can I improve this>? 

SUGGESTIONS ANYONE! 

 

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6 responses »

  1. i’d recommend something to punch. one of those big hanging bags or artificial torsos. violent exercise, in other words. offers a little time not thinking/dwelling on the problem while releasing feel-good hormones and getting out aggression. i still compulsively think about my issues, but not like i used to. madness lies that way. love to you.

      • what’s the well-worn expression? depression is anger turned inward? i’d be pissed if i were in your place. (actually, i kind of am in your place. square one. and it sucks.) there are a lot of ways to solve anger issues (frustration, dissatisfaction, end-of-my-rope-ed-ness). you don’t have to get physical (i don’t), but it sure does sound fun to me. in any event: you will find a way through. just keep pushing and find ways to get your mind off of the apparent problem.

  2. The fact you are even going to groups is a step in the right direction. Writing about it is another. I’ve felt like you’re feeling for a decade. While Im starting to figure myself out some, I always slip and sometimes its 1 step forward 5 back. It’s very frustrating. The best advice I can give is one that is going to sound stupid and hallmark. Dont give up trying. Seriously. Because when you do, then its just going to spiral.

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